Thursday, April 15, 2010

We all need a deep breath now and then.

So yesterday was an incredibly difficult day for me. My stress level was through the roof and everything that could have gone wrong seemed to have gone wrong. As my stress level was rising I was trying to remind myself. This is just a moment. In one week this moment will no longer matter so don’t let yourself get to worked up. Don’t ruin your day or be mean/ angry because the consequences of that are not worth just trying to get through this moment.

I am a tremendously anxious person. I worry constantly and always work to keep my head on straight. I have over the last month tried to work on that. I try and take the advice I give to others about taking a deep breathe and trying to take things one step at a time. One of my best friends practices weekly and daily meditations. I know I am sorely lacking in the time that I allow my mind and spirit to decompress from all that I put it through. So I have been making a conscious effort to work on giving my mind, body and spirit a break.

I am trying to take little time outs to try and keep my blood pressure down; reminding me even the most horrible moments will be fleeting and will pass. I am trying to be more active and take power walks or go to the gym to release pent up energy and frustration. I am also listening to podcasts by Gil Fronsdale a practicing Buddhist with a PhD in Buddhism studies. The sound of his voice is soothing enough let alone all the wonderful things he has to say in his podcasts.

Another thing I have spoken to my boyfriend about is something that is very big for me. I am working on being a better listener and controlling my reactions to difficult situations. It sounds relatively simple however, it is far from. I don’t like being visibly weak, vulnerable or goddess forbid wrong. I am wrong often however and need to find a way to wear that gracefully. I am enjoying my new thoughtfulness and realize I spend too much time criticizing others behavior and not enough critiquing my own. I am working to change that in hopes of being a better person, partner, friend and HPS.

Check out the podcast, you may love them as much as me. They are a wonderful way to pass the time and be self reflective.

Blessed Be )O(
~Kanani

1 comments:

Wendilea said...

Thanks so much for posting the links! Just being self aware is a very big first step towards spiritual integration. Bravo for you Kanani!